Who hasn’t got a bad date story these days? For anyone trying (and failing) to get their head around dating apps or online dating, these constant nightmare scenarios can feel like a sick joke some evil witch is playing on you.

To stop us all from becoming everything we hate (a.k.a. The Date From Hell), Harmony has revealed what their users consider to be the biggest date faux pas. In short, these are the things you should never ever do on a first date.

Be rude to staff

Wherever you have a date, the worst thing you can do is act like a total d-bag to the staff. Not only does it make for 10/10 uncomfortable atmos, but it shows you up to be a mega a-hole. Dunno about you, but someone ordering waiting staff around like a military general instantly makes my vagina seal up.

Constantly check your phone.

Hey! Are you actually listening to a word I’m saying because it looks like you’re scrolling through your mate’s dog’s Instagram? This is a) rude, b) disrespectful, and c) annoying. My worst is when they have their phone on the table, right there between you, like it’s on the sodding date too.

Talk about your EX

Like bumholes, everyone’s got them. Refrain from blathering on about them, though, it makes people feel weird and on edge. If you chomp on about how awful your ex was, it screams NOT OVER IT. And if you’re bigging them up, it’s like… get back with them then?

Swear too much

Swearing can be hilarious in the right context. However, if your entire vocabulary is limited to a combo of bollocks, tits and fucks, it can come across as rude, aggressive and kinda moronic.

Refuse pay your way

It’s an instant boner killer when your date doesn’t even pretend to make a grab for their wallet when the bill comes. Realistically, splitting the bill or taking it in turns is The Dream Scenario because, well, it’s the 21st Century.

Turn late

If you know you’ve got somewhere important to be, you should naturally leave extra ‘just-in-case’ time to get there. Being late signals, you’re not that arsed and actually value your own time more than someone else’s. Bad vibes from the get-go.

Come on too strong

Obvs if you’re interested, show it. But don’t turn into a creep who won’t take no for an answer. There’s a fine line and if it’s crossed, our legs are going to remain crossed indefinitely.